After a short trip to leh, I'm writing this..moreover writing something after long time..This is not how i feel after a brief trip...I feel completely not wanting to do anything at all..Just bunked office just by telling some stupid reason and writing this blog..Not sure if any of my office colleagues following this blog may be brings me trouble..but as usual i'm ready to take anything even if its getting fired..
Life gives us lots of moments to live..Its not limited to one possibility its multiple ways. you can get to choose your own destiny..really no one can bother you on the way of it..But why i'm being smashed with this much thoughts rolling in my mind not able to concentrate on anything and being depressed on nothing and not wanting to do anything?
Is it because i don't like to do anything? will this be solved if i give some time? or this is correct way of making some changes in life which i never faced? with all confusions rolling on..still thinking about that..
being depressed is one of the things which often happen to people like me who is introvert and not being with people all the time..but always enjoyed with own actions and doing different things in life..
ok coming to present time..Am i doing what i like to do? how long i can cheat myself saying with the answer yes? may be i have always having a idea of making me believe i love what i do agenda? or im afraid of losing the money which im making through this profession? What is it bothering me? or it is the emptiness of life which makes me go mad about this stage of life? Really have no idea about these things..
But things are not good certainly not sure what to do and how to bring back..
while tying this blog got a call from an unknown saying "i saw your big data videos on YouTube, Im seeing alliance for my sister and one of the guy mentioned he is working in bigdata so wanted to check whether bigdata has future?" How do i answer? Anything in the existence is not stable. anything may happen at anytime and you might lose anything..but as a human mind we always try to look for conformity...
What i'm afraid of ? am i afraid of taking firm decisions? or afraid of breaking the rules and the fake reputation i have created among relatives and friends by acting normal..
i guess both..I'm not what anyone thinks i'm..its difficult to explain since even i don't know who i am..may be i'm just a coward who don't do necessary actions to live by his heart..or a coward who just thinks and leaves.
may be it might changed a bit now...but this is the beginning...i need to lead this to a new beginning..
because in this unpredictable life we cant just be depressed..!!
I know i will be back from this chapter soon with much more energy..but just passing this time on..
Life gives us lots of moments to live..Its not limited to one possibility its multiple ways. you can get to choose your own destiny..really no one can bother you on the way of it..But why i'm being smashed with this much thoughts rolling in my mind not able to concentrate on anything and being depressed on nothing and not wanting to do anything?
Is it because i don't like to do anything? will this be solved if i give some time? or this is correct way of making some changes in life which i never faced? with all confusions rolling on..still thinking about that..
being depressed is one of the things which often happen to people like me who is introvert and not being with people all the time..but always enjoyed with own actions and doing different things in life..
ok coming to present time..Am i doing what i like to do? how long i can cheat myself saying with the answer yes? may be i have always having a idea of making me believe i love what i do agenda? or im afraid of losing the money which im making through this profession? What is it bothering me? or it is the emptiness of life which makes me go mad about this stage of life? Really have no idea about these things..
But things are not good certainly not sure what to do and how to bring back..
while tying this blog got a call from an unknown saying "i saw your big data videos on YouTube, Im seeing alliance for my sister and one of the guy mentioned he is working in bigdata so wanted to check whether bigdata has future?" How do i answer? Anything in the existence is not stable. anything may happen at anytime and you might lose anything..but as a human mind we always try to look for conformity...
What i'm afraid of ? am i afraid of taking firm decisions? or afraid of breaking the rules and the fake reputation i have created among relatives and friends by acting normal..
i guess both..I'm not what anyone thinks i'm..its difficult to explain since even i don't know who i am..may be i'm just a coward who don't do necessary actions to live by his heart..or a coward who just thinks and leaves.
may be it might changed a bit now...but this is the beginning...i need to lead this to a new beginning..
because in this unpredictable life we cant just be depressed..!!
I know i will be back from this chapter soon with much more energy..but just passing this time on..
